Tuesday, March 13, 2007

I have lived in this world for 17 years and One Day.

Thanks dey...
I am now officially old.

One may think that 17 is not considered as old, But hey, it's a 2-figure.

Remember back then,

When you got like the 17th position in class,

And Mom will go like "Wah, banyaknya nombor!"
Thus, this reaffirmed my statement that 17 IS considered old.

How can a figure that is considered BIG suddenly be considered as 'Still Young'?

Never mind.

Ignore me.

I'm just blabbering while thinking what I want to say.


So,as the one-day-ago-birthday girl,

Today (well, technically yesterday) gave me a lot of time to reflect on my so-called-sweet-sixteen.

More importantly, to reflect upon my whole life being Khadijah.
(P.S : Just so you know, I LOVE my name VERY MUCH!)


For me, being 17 is a big thing.

I am not anymore a child (always is in heart),
over the whole adolescent phase,

But not quite a full-grown woman.


I don't have that sort of problem when I was 13.
13, I'm still a child.

15, I'm a full adolescent with raging hormones.
17, I don't know what I am.


I am now 17.

I have to say,
I live a great life thoroughly.

I am pretty satisfied with myself.


I have got lots and lots of friends.
I have won something that I am really proud of.
I have my fair share of heart breaks and love.
I have my fair share of ups and downs.
I kicked people's ass and people kicked my ass.
And most importantly,
I learnt about life through my experiences.

Like they say, there's no better teacher than experience itself.


After this year,
I'll see myself leaving home,
Finding my own path of life,
Somewhere out there.

Getting married.

Get kids.

Raise a family.

Have my own money.
Shop till I drop without feeling guilty.
(will too at the end of the day tho'.)

Celebrating my birthday outside my home
(maybe not, not sure!)

Get a driving licence,

Get a home to live in,

Get to manipulate people's mind a.k.a The Psychiatrist.

The main point is,
I see myself as A BIG PERSON (virtually) in the future.

But somehow, the thought that you'd be leaving home sometimes just scare the hell out of you.
Well, if not you, it does scare the hell out of me.

After this year,
I could no longer run to Mom or Dad when I messed up.

Mom or Dad cannot be there and say "A-ha, I told you so." or even warn you to not mess up. (well truthfully speaking, it never works since you are born. You just HAVE to mess up)
You live up to your own consequences of your act.
When you ran out of money, you cannot always rely to F&M scholarship (Father and Mother Scholarship)
It's just you and you alone.

Surely I'll have more fun once I'm out of the house,
But hey, once you left,
You won't have that place where you'll just go one day when you feel so terrible,
And have the assurance that that place will always be there for you together with its contents.
Maybe once in a while you can do so,
But not all the time.

Ah, the whole leaving-house-thing is a big thing for me.

I cannot expect what awaits for me this year.
But certainly,
this year, I have set my goals.

Before I reached 18 years old, I want :
1- A boyfriend (yes, I want one. I don't need one. I just want one.)
2 - Kicked somebody's ass and shout 'BITCH!' right in front of his/her face (Ok,this of all the sudden crossed my mind. Random-ness)
3- Driving licence.

4 -Permission to go out whenever I want

5 - More and more presents from people (crazy thought too!)

6 -Score SPM (durh!) and tell my parents "A-ha! See? Told you I can do so!"
7 - At least spend my own money for once, which I earn to buy something I want
8 - Celebrate Valentine's with A GUY

9 - Go hang out with my girls

10 - Drive around KL, just me and somebody (not my parents tho')

11 - Go figure my life


Wait, I think I got my thoughts messed up.

Should reconsider the whole checklist.
For now, you shall ignore that list,

Till I come up with the new list.

A definite one.

P.S : Frankly speaking, I want to blog about my birthday. But I want to blog it one shot, and in case if there's still people passing me my presents after my birthday *HINTS HINTS*, then it would be a hassle for me to rewrite the whole thing and surely it'd be rude if I don't mention you as one of the thoughtful giver/wisher/sms-er for my birthday. And also because my camera is not working. Cannot take picture.


P.P.S : Well, this is a crappy post. Sorry you have to read through it and think Khadijah has gone crazy.


P.P.P.S : Thanks to everyone who wishes me happy birthday. This is the best birthday I had my whole life!


Signing Out,

A-day-ago-Birthday Bitch!

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