Thursday, January 10, 2008

Saya Ni Sungguh Kelakar

Person 1 : What burger is happy?
Person 2 : Bergembira.

- Mix.fm advertisement.

*****

Get it?
Get it?
I think it's awfully funny.
Why don't anyone get it?
I think it's funny.
Why no one else thinks it's funny?
Why?

I bet if Iona's here to read this post,
She'll agree it will go with the 2 lamest jokes ever.
Credits to Her Boyfriend for the EXTREMELY lame jokes.

Joke 1 :
"So there's this two bananas walking around. And as they were walking, one of them slipped. Why was that?"
"Because it slipped on a peeled banana."

- -"

Joke Two :
"So there's 10 fishes in a tank. 2 of them died. Why did the water level in the tank increases?"
"Because another 8 of the fishes cried"

- - "

Yeah. very lame.

Today's the 10th.
Cuti babe!
Sebab Awal Muharram.
Awal Muharram is like the first of January in the Islamic Calendar.
We don't really have any special celebration for it.
We just say a prayer for the end of the year and early of a new year.
Simple one, real brief.
Why they give Public holiday?
I pun tak tau la. (Aisha LOVES to say this)

I met Zaty yesterday.
Gosh, we didn't see each other for ages man!
She's in a well condition if anyone's ever wondering.

Yes, I am still hunting for job.
But on the bright side, I am going to get my L soon.
Bwahahaha!!

Uh other than that, I am supposed to go to PBSM Headquarter today.
But since Suzanne couldn't make it,
(and I doubt I have any transport)
We planned to go together some other time.
It's for the sake of charity.
They can't MAKE us go on certain days right?
Furthermore, it's not like they're the only organization for charity.
I tak kisah la if you don't want us.
Eleh!

On the lighter side,
Since I am in a very devastating economic condition (Hahaha! Big fat words for 'broke')
I was thinking,
Would you pay me if I give you some of my time?

No, no. Shut up and listen la!

**advertisement starts**

Since I have a lot of time on my plate (figuratively!)
Why not, say I do chores or errands for you?
Would you pay me?

Like for example,
You're crazy ass busy with school life, tuitions, colleges or something,
And you don't have time for minor errands.
So this is where I come in.
I'll do your minor errands for you.
SeE? Giving you some of my time. In a way.

Maybe you need someone to type your assignment for you,
Or you need someone to type a letter for you,
Or type your contoh karangan that's due next Wednesday,
Or go pass some stuffs to a friend of yours,
Or do minor research online for you,
Or go grab things for you.
Like I say, minor errands.

I am not only good at secretarial stuffs,
I am also a great Personal Assistant.
I am good with people.
And I've got a lot of time.

And if you ever need consultancy,
Or advice,
Or a wise thought,
or maybe a friend to talk to (when you don't have someone to talk to, maybe because your best friend is in some really ulu place for NS),
I could come to you.
I'll be your friend, your listener or your cupid.
(Yes, I am also capable of hooking people up).
Fret not, customers' confidentiality is strictly between the customer and me.
Privacy is vital.

And I'll throw in the first 3 sessions for free. Just for you to see if I'm any good. If I am not, you may leave. No strings attached.
(And no, I will not use any of your secrets against you. That's a very childish immature act)

Like Cher said,
I am not professional,
And she wouldn't hire me unless if she's rich and has too much money to waste,
But think again,
I am cheaper.
And honestly, if I am a professional,
Would you still come and see me?
And I know giving advice is like a thing friends do to each other,
But I am not doing it because I want to.
That's because a good financial support would do my economical status a good favour.

Or or maybe you want me to plan you a party and you're too busy to plan one?
You give me the budget, list of people to invite and go do whatever you want to do,
Sit back, relax and see the dream party realized for you!

Or you need a present wrapper.
And you're too busy to wrap present for that person.
I could do it for you.

Or you need a last-minute shopping,
Just fill me in with details on the person you're giving the present to,
And the budget for that present,
I'll find you your perfect present.

Honestly! I'd do anything at your service.
(Anything except anything that involves sex, porn or uncomfortable taboo issues)

You could pay me cash.
And I accept credit transferred to my Maxis account.
Your call.
Email me, drop a comment, or give me a call.

Khadijah at :
khadijah_kathycute@yahoo.co.uk
khadijah_kathysweetgal@hotmail.com

Leave me your email and details on the chores I need to do, apart from your personal details, like your name, address and phone number.

I'll contact you and we'll make a deal.

Spread the words around.
Thanks for your time.

*this is strictly for anyone in the area of Klang Valley alone
*everything is negotiable
*this is not a joke and this advertisement is specially dedicated to busy people with not enough time to themselves

**advertisement ends**

So would you hire me now?
Would you?

I'm serious about the advertisement.
Ok, not that much.
But it might just work you know.
I am willing to give it a try.
Why not you?

And I am also planning to take up yoga.
No, seriously!
See? No one ever takes me seriously.

Signing Out,
Call Me If You Need Me!
(I am not being sarcastic. Seriously! Call me!)

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